A few years ago, if someone told me they were in a "situationship," I'd probably raise an eyebrow and ask them to explain. Today, though, it's a word I hear almost every week—from friends, from clients, from strangers venting on social media. And the strangest part? I've been in one myself. Actually, more than one. So I get it. Situationships are everywhere in 2025, and I think it's time we take a real, honest look at why so many of us are stuck in them.
What Is a Situationship?
If you're unfamiliar, a situationship is that blurry gray zone between friendship and a committed romantic relationship. It usually starts casually. Maybe you meet someone, there's chemistry, and before long you're spending a lot of time together. You're talking often. You're physically intimate. You do couple-y things—Netflix marathons, weekend trips, deep conversations at midnight—but there's one big difference: there's no label. No clarity. No agreement about exclusivity or direction.
It's a relationship, just not officially. And the worst part? It feels like more than it is, but never becomes what you hoped it might be.
My First Situationship
I'll never forget my first real situationship. We met during a period in my life when I wasn't looking for anything serious. At least, that's what I told myself. But slowly, things shifted. We messaged all day. We saw each other more often than not. Friends started asking, “So, are you two together now?” And every time I asked myself that same question, I realized I didn't have a real answer.
Eventually, I brought it up. The “what are we?” talk. His response? A classic: “Let's not ruin what we have by putting a label on it.” At the time, that sounded reasonable enough. But weeks passed, and I started noticing that all the emotional intimacy and time investment wasn't going anywhere. I was deeply attached, but still technically single. When it ended, it hurt like a real breakup—only there was nothing to mourn officially. That made it worse.
Why Are Situationships So Common Now?
After experiencing a few more blurred-line connections, I started asking: why does this keep happening? And why does it feel like everyone I know is going through the same thing?
I think 2025 has created the perfect storm for situationships to thrive, and here's why:
1. Modern Dating Culture Is Non-Committal by Design
Dating apps give us more choices than ever, but with that comes a paradox: the more options we have, the harder it is to commit. It's like scrolling through Netflix for 40 minutes and still not picking a movie. There's always the feeling that something better might be one swipe away.
I've talked to people who've had deep connections with someone, yet keep browsing dating apps just in case. This fear of missing out fuels non-commitment, and situationships often feel like the easiest way to get emotional intimacy without fully settling down.
2. We're Scared of Labels (and Rejection)
I've been guilty of this too. We tell ourselves that keeping things “chill” means we're being mature, non-dramatic, and modern. But the truth? Many of us are just scared. Scared that asking for clarity will scare the other person away. Scared to seem “too intense.” Scared of hearing “I'm not looking for anything serious.”
So we wait. We hope the other person will bring it up first. We rationalize the lack of commitment. And before we know it, we're stuck in a situationship that's lasted months or even years.
3. Loneliness Makes Us Settle for Half-Connections
Especially post-pandemic and amid global uncertainty, I think a lot of us are craving connection more than ever. But instead of risking vulnerability, we often settle for low-stakes companionship. I've seen it in myself and others—this tendency to hold on to someone who offers some affection, rather than risk losing it all by asking for more.
Situationships offer just enough to ease loneliness, but never enough to build something lasting. That middle ground is comfortable, but also quietly damaging.
4. Social Media Normalizes It
Let's be honest: the idea of an undefined relationship isn't just accepted now—it's romanticized. TikToks, Instagram stories, tweets—they're full of people joking about being the “almost girlfriend” or “texting a man who doesn't know he's my boyfriend.” We laugh, but there's pain under the surface. It makes emotional confusion look relatable, even trendy, and that makes it harder for people to recognize situationships as a problem rather than a phase.
The Emotional Toll
People underestimate how draining situationships can be. I've spent weeks overanalyzing text messages, wondering what someone really meant, spiraling over small changes in behavior. When there's no clarity, every little thing feels magnified. You can't ask for basic relationship reassurances without feeling like you're overstepping—because technically, there's no relationship.
And when it ends, you don't get the validation of a “real” breakup. Friends might not take it seriously. You're left grieving something that was never fully yours.
That confusion messes with your self-esteem. It makes you question your worth. It teaches you to expect less. And if you go through enough of them, it starts to feel like the norm.
How I Got Out
Getting out of a situationship requires brutal honesty—with yourself and with the other person. For me, it meant acknowledging when I wanted more than was being offered. It meant saying, “This isn't enough for me,” even when I was scared of losing the connection entirely.
And yes, I lost some people. But I also reclaimed my peace. I started setting clearer boundaries, learning to communicate my needs early on, and walking away when those needs weren't met.
It's not easy. You don't “fix” this overnight. But clarity brings peace, and peace is worth more than attention from someone who won't commit.
So What Do We Do About It?
If you're stuck in a situationship in 2025, I want to say this: you're not crazy, needy, or difficult for wanting clarity. Wanting a defined, mutual connection is not outdated—it's human. Don't let modern dating convince you otherwise.
Here's what I've learned:
- If someone avoids commitment, believe them the first time.
- If you're constantly anxious, confused, or seeking reassurance—you're not in the right dynamic.
- If you want more, you're allowed to ask. And if the answer is vague or dismissive, that is an answer.
You deserve the kind of relationship that doesn't leave you guessing. One that's mutual, clear, and fulfilling. Situationships might be common in 2025, but they don't have to be your story.
Final Thoughts
I've been in situationships that left me drained, confused, and feeling like I was asking for too much. But the truth is, I was asking for the bare minimum: clarity, commitment, care. In a world that glorifies ambiguity, it takes courage to want more. And even more courage to walk away when you're not getting it.
If you're reading this and see yourself in my story—know that you're not alone. But also know that you don't have to stay stuck. There's love out there that won't leave you questioning your worth.
And that's worth waiting for.
This article could include affiliate links and reflects my personal experience and viewpoints. I recommend that readers carry out their own investigation and form their own conclusions before making any decisions.
